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剛剛在版上看到有一個聊天室
無聊之下也去玩了一下
卻遇到了一個.....
奇怪的人....
You: hi
Stranger: Please don't hang up on me. I have self esteem issues
Stranger: Oh, hi
Stranger: I have a confession to make
You: oh~
Stranger: I cry when I masterbate sometimes
You: what?
Stranger: A lot of people think I'm strange. When I admit this to my friends,
they ask me if I'm depressed. They wonder if I'm plotting suicide or
harboring intentions to harm others close to me.
You: dont do that
Stranger: Nobody seems to understand. I'm not upset when I masturbate, I'm
gleeful. I'm jolly.
You: you can because you think you can
Stranger: I used to watch snuff films with my dad when I was younger and I
remember learning that crying releases a chemical in the brain, similar to
drug use, that actually increases the potency of orgasms. It's excellent.
Stranger: So even though I'm not a high school cheerleader tied to a toilet
with a gun to my head, I always shed a tear or two when I punish my snake. It
helps release pressure and keeps me stable enough to make it through the day.
Believe me, kids, it doesn‘t get much better than this.
Stranger: How are you?
You: 別自殺
You: anything well be fine
Stranger: anything?
Stranger: I don't even know what to do with my life anymore.
You: dont think bed thing
You: jesus can help you
Stranger: How? Can he loan me some money? I'm kinda broke.
You: jesus is Multi-purpose
Stranger: Like a cleaning agent!
You: hope he
Stranger: I bet Jesus is tired of hearing everyone's problems.
You: no~no~no
You: believe jesus
You: he can help you
Stranger: I bet he's like "I died for these assholes? Dad, couldn't you do a
bit better. I mean seriously."
Stranger: Not saying he's a bad guy but why the hell would he care about us?
You: can you speak chinese?
Stranger: nope
You: oh really
You: that's ok
Stranger: Oh well. Maybe one day I'll learn Chinese.
You: haha
Stranger: I take it you speak it?
You: be happy
Stranger: not much to be happy about. The world is gonna end soon and I'm
broke.
You: dont do that
Stranger: I'm not doing anything. I'm just wasting away.
You: 天下本無事 庸人自擾
Stranger: Just slowly dying inside
You: that's chinse ldiom
You: it's mean
You: tomorrow always have sunshine
You: be happy
Stranger: What if you live in Alaska? No sun for a month.
You: can walk this world
You: you can see some beautfly thing
Stranger: yeah, maybe. Right now though I'm pretty bummed out.
Stranger: Well, I better get some sleep. Thanks for the support. I thought
you would have made fun of me or something.
You: ok
You: have a goodnight
You: anything well be fine
Stranger: thanks.
他好像睡了?
但我實在看不懂他在說什麼阿阿阿阿阿
希望有版友可以拯救我的破英文
讓我搞懂
他到底想幹麻.....
PS. 這是我跟我朋友兩人努力了半天加上奇摩翻譯的結果...
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