一‧
男孩:為什麼今天的晚餐又冷又難吃?
爸爸:因為你媽在裡面放了她的心和靈魂。
原文:
Boy: Why is the food so cold and bland?
Dad: Because your mother put her heart and soul into it.
二‧
自殺炸彈客最害怕什麼事?
孤獨而死
原文:
What is a suicide bombers worse fear?
Dying alone...
三‧
需要幾位示威者才能換一個燈泡?
好問題,示威者改變不了任何事實。
原文:
How many protestors do you need to change a lightbulb?
Trick question. Protestors don't change anything.
四‧
為什麼盲人歌手史蒂夫永遠見不到朋友了?
因為他結婚了。
原文:
Why couldn't Stevie Wonder see his friends?
Because he's married.
五‧
一個漁夫抓到一條鯊魚,當他準備把鯊魚拉上船時,
鯊魚說話了:「別殺我!我是隻會魔法的鯊魚,我可以實現你一個願望。」
「好吧。」漁夫想了想說:「我要我的小弟弟能碰到地板!」
於是鯊魚把漁夫的兩條腿給吃了。
原文:
A fisherman catches a shark. As soon as he pulls him up the shark starts
yelling, "Wait wait wait... I'm a magic shark, I can grant you wishes if you
let me go."
"Alright," says the man, "I want my penis to reach the floor".
So the shark ate his legs.
六‧
為什麼美國要把"colour"的"u"拿掉?
因為 fuck u!
原文:
Why did America remove the "u" from "colour"?
Because fuck u that's why.
七‧
為什麼自殺是非法的?
因為你破壞了政府的財產。
原文:
Why is suicide illegal?
Destruction of government property.
八‧
天主教:會發生這些鳥事是因為你是個王八蛋
他媽的宗教
原文:
Religious Shit
Catholicism: Shit happens because you're bad.
笑了下地獄
哈利波特和猶太人之間有何不同?哈利波特成功的逃出了密室。