https://theoutline.com/post/7267/living-with-passive-suicidal-ideation
這篇寫得太美了一定要存一下
今天下班還是喝酒聽emo搖滾樂嘶吼 像烈子一樣
到底平凡的社畜人生是有什麼可以期待的
父母說的話根本就反效果
如果活著本來就很苦 那我活來幹嘛
況且我沒求開導
聽一半就把說教shut down
你跟我講這些老生常談有什麼用 我不會因為非洲兒童還是烏克蘭人過得比我苦就覺得快樂
只能繼續漂浮 用一些東西短暫地轉移深層的不快樂。

I realized that as long as one doesn’t have an active plan, it doesn’t seem to matter at all. I guessit’s almost as if, if it’s not (going to) cause damage, it’s not something that worth the resources/energy. It may sound cruel but it is what it is. It actually helps me in a way not to see it as a big deal as well.