[請益] 英文自傳求批

作者: auron4041 (雷電)   2014-05-21 11:43:51
最近因為有調職的希望 所以需要英文自傳
不過實際寫才發現真的很多文法不知道該怎麼用
變成不斷找資料然後拼湊出來一個怪東西...我的英文真的很爛
請有能力的版友幫我訂正一下錯誤和改成較合適的字句 謝謝
I come from a family of four, and I am the second child. My parents have
owned and operated a restaurant for 15 years,as a result of the way my
parents raised me, it let me to be a man of responsibility, My older brother
is a project manager in clothing manufacturing. He is a confident and
energetic person, he teach me if you are not give up you will be success.
In 2012, I graduated from the Department of Electronic Engineering, Oriental
Institute of Technology. During four years of college, my focus was on
Embedded Internet and Linux. With the growing enthusiasm for everything I was
learning, in my sophomore year, I volunteered to join the lab as an
undergraduate. I completed my primary project Wireless Factory Management,
which was developed from the Zigbee and programmed in C++.
I switched my focus to the Linux System before my graduation, and upon my
advisor's encouragement, I passed the exams and got the RHCSA (Red Hat
Certified System Administrator) certification. After school hours, I had a
part-time job in school, it is a assistant in my department to management of
classroom and arrange the documents.
After graduation, I fulfilled my mandatory military service about one year,
one month later I joined the Decision Group to be a Technical Customer
Service. I use by skype to maintenance and technical support customer around
the world. In Decision Group, This job brought me a broader perspective, let
I met the customer in each country. And I also to learned a lot to use about
Linux and Network Architecture.
my goal is to become an Network Engineer by integrating years of working
experiences. In addition to network engineer, I also plan to further my
training in other fields, such as mysql and the C++, in order to broaden my
skill set.
另外如果我打算再第四段加一段
"我接觸了很多來自世界各地的工程師 從他們身上我學到了很多網路方面的應用"
適合嗎 這一段我該怎麼寫會比較好呢?

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